Thursday, April 30, 2009

Unanswered Prayers

Last night at Choir Rehearsal, our Choir Director told us to think about unanswered prayers. I cannot tell you how many times I have personally thought about unanswered prayers. It's funny to me because as he was sharing a story, I thought about how petty some of my unanswered prayers have been...that is until he shared a similar story. I can remember countless "boyfriends" with which things were not going the "right" way and remember crying and praying to Jesus that He would just make all things better and for our "relationship" not to end and 9 times out of 10 I was the one to end the relationship. As I sit here and think about those nights I cant help but thank God for not answering my prayers because He ultimately did. I remember one of my first prayers when I realized I was falling "crazy" over Joe. I asked Jesus to just give me peace. I had a boyfriend and Joe had plenty of girls that would date him. Joe and I were friends. He was the one I went to for advice and to listen to me. And then one night, sitting at the good ole' Forest Park Dwarf House I realized that this guy who had been literally my best friend had just stolen my heart. I needed peace. Peace to end things with one guy and start something with a guy that had been just my friend for so long. I tell people all the time that God has a funny sense of humor. It wasn't even two weeks after Joe and I began dating that he told me he loved me. He said it first! My heart melted and I knew right then and there that God had given me much more. Joe and I had arguments while we were dating, we still do (it's called a happy marriage!) but instead of asking God to make things better I ask God to guide me in the direction that is best for me. I have given my entire life to Christ and have allowed Him to lead me. I am so thankful for the unanswered prayers in my life because it has made me who I am today. And I am a very happy, very blessed, very loved wife to an amazing man who still to this day is my best friend and knows more about me than I know about myself. I am the mother to twin boys, that have followed in their daddy's footsteps and stolen my heart and soon the mother to a little girl. I have some pretty awesome friends and the most amazing church family. If you would have told me as a 16/17 year old in high school that this is where my life would end up, I'm not sure I would have believed you.

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

My Angels

My boys began their baseball career last year at Salem Baptist Church. It's such a wonderful CHRISTIAN organization where they teach that winning is NOT everything but having fun IS! The boys love it and so do mom and dad. Well their coach, Coach Billy, started giving out game balls this year. Each game is different depending on how many balls there are to give out AND depending on how many excellent players we had. Well last night the boys had a makeup game from a game that got rained out. The game didn't start until 7PM and let me tell you, we had 11 tired boys in the dugout (poor dugout mom, but thank goodness it wasn't me!) I was so proud of my boys. They go out there each game with determination on their little faces and as soon as the ball heads towards the bat they close their little eyes and swing, something we're working on. So as the game ended, Coach Billy called all the little Angels (our team name) to the fence to announce the recipiant of the game ball for the night. He said that one little boy never got out and actually outran a throw to first base. Tried to get someone out at 2nd base and hit the ball. Was in the "ready" position all night. Then he gave the game ball to Bryce. The point of me writing this isn't to brag about my B-Man but to tell you how much confidence Coach Billy just gave to him. Bryce was smiling from ear to ear. He came home and took his gameball with him to the bathroom while he took his bath and then took his game ball to bed. This morning he had the show and tell bag at school and he was allowed to take 3 items. He took my ultrasound pictures of his baby sister, Maggie, a cell phone and of course...his game ball. His teacher asked him what he loved the most and he kissed his ball and said "my game ball!" He told me that he was so proud of himself for doing a good job and for giving it his all. And the sweetest thing, we told Ethan that he would get a gameball one day and he said that "it was ok, Bryce won it this time for doing good! I'm proud of him too!" I'm so proud of both of my boys.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Married life

So, I like most wives believe that I have the most amazing husband in the world. Every morning and I mean EVERY morning he wakes up with the boys and lets me sleep. He gets the boys ready for school, fixes their breakfast and packs their lunch then sends them to me so I can do their hair (with Joe not having hair, he has no clue in this area). Then if I want I am able to go back to sleep. During the first trimester of my pregnancy I was absolutely miserable and he did it all. He helps so much around the house and with the boys. I know I am truly blessed to have such a wonderful man to call my husband and the father of my children. But as I reflect on my marriage (which isn't perfect by any means) I am reminded of other marriages...marriages that have failed due to adultery, abuse and financial reasons. I know many couples that have gone through difficult times in their marriage, some of which worked through their problems and others that just called it quits. When I said my vows, I truly meant till death do we part. Joe and I was able to attend a beautiful wedding this past weekend. My friend Laura married an amazing man, Jarred. This is not Laura's first marriage. She was married to another amazing man, Shawn, but sadly Shawn was taken home to be with the Lord after a very serious motorcycle accident. To see my friend, who is just a couple years younger than I am go through this was so difficult for me. It really reminded me to cherish every day with the ones I love, especially my husband. Laura met Jarred a while later and like I said, was married to him this past weekend. But I think of Laura and how much her first vows meant to her and what an example she led throughout their marriage. She knows first hand what the words "till death do we part" truly mean. I am so happy for her and Jarred. However, I think of other marriages. The ones where "things just didn't work out so we ended it." I mean I understand if abuse and adultery is involved but to end a marriage over differences....I'm just not sure. I don't believe in divorce unless it's because of adultery or abuse (physical, mental or emotional.) I remember hearing someone say "My first husband I want to look like this but my second husband I want to look like that." She was already preparing herself for a failed marriage. HOW? Joe was not the man I ever imagined myself with. He was my best friend. He was the guy that I told things to and would give me advice and that was it...until I realized that he was EVERYTHING I ever wanted and so much more. I am so blessed and so thankful to have Joe. He amazes me everyday. He promised me when we first got engaged that he would always take care of me and he has never went back on his word. I cannot imagine my life without him. To sit here and think of all the people we know that are in the midst of divorce. Joe and I are not another statistic. I hope that we all realize how serious wedding vows are. I know people who have gone through the worst circumstances possible and are more in love now than ever before and those people truly amaze me. When they had every right and every reason to let go, they stuck it out and gave it their all. I'm not sure why I wanted to write about all this but it's just been weighing so heavily on my heart the past couple of weeks. My ultimate goal in life is to become a Christian marriage therapist. I want to help people better their marriage rather than end it. I have such a passion for marriage and keeping God's commands for us.

Thursday, April 16, 2009

Happy "late" Easter

What a great Easter Sunday it was. We've really tried to emphasize that Easter isn't about the Easter Bunny but about the EMPTY TOMB! We do, of course, have the Easter Baskets from the Easter Bunny but it's a gift. I help teach 4-5 year old Children's Choir at church and the main director has been teaching all the kids a wonderful song. The words are this: This is where they laid Him, the stone was rolled in tight. His friends were very sad when they walked home that night. But on Easter morning the stone was rolled away. The Angel said "HE IS ALIVE! Oh happy Easter Day!" Hallelujah, Hallelujah Jesus is ALIVE!" It has little hand gestures that go with it. To watch my boys sing it brings tears to my eyes. They looked at me after learning the song and asked if Jesus is alive, why is He in Heaven? I told them that Jesus lives in our hearts when we ask Him to come in. My boys are asking so many questions lately. I know that right now they're not ready to accept Christ into their hearts but I cannot wait for the day that they do.
Our sermon on Sunday was so wonderful. And of course, the choir got to sing some pretty awesome songs. My favorite was "The end of the beginning" sang by one of my friends, Holly. She is so talented and so passionate that she touches our hearts every time she sings. During the second service at church, she had everyone on their feet midway through the song. To see how much our church loves Christ literally brings tears to my eyes. You can feel His presence. You can feel His love. Then to follow it up with some good ole' preaching' just tops the cake. I love our church. I love my Savior. I love what He has done in my life. Life isn't always easy but He promises us that He will always be with us. What an AWESOME GOD I SERVE!